Sunday, 11 October 2015

Mrs LRM and the Nail Polish Naughtiness

Mrs LRM, once upon a time had a very respectable job in banking. As a beacon of respectability I would sometimes head out on business visitations. If you couldn't come to the bank to sort out the admin side of your business banking, not a problem as I would come to you.

I had built up a good relationship with Sonia (not her real name), the office manager from We Look After the Community (not their real name) which was a not for profit organisation. W.L.A.K got a new charismatic CEO who I briefly met once. 

After a couple of years, the CEO rang me one day and explained that Sonia needed to be taken off the accounts straight away. I asked why and the CEO explained that Sonia had left the organisation. Normally I didn't deal with the CEO so I rang Sonia at home as a smelt a rat. Sonia explained that she hadn't left and there were some major shenanigans going on. Sonia explained that she had taken leave to prevent the CEO from sacking her and she had handed all the office records to a forensic accountant.

To cut a long story short, the CEO had been using government funds which had been allocated to help disadvantaged members of our society for their own personal use. First class airfares, 5 star accommodation, dinners in New York etc etc.......does it kind of sound familiar? This seems to be a very modern malaise that we see time and time again from business leaders that hold positions of authority in society.

Anyway, the charismatic CEO was convicted of fraud and sent to prison, much to their shocked surprise. After the dust had settled I had returned to W.L.A.K as we needed to add some new signatories to their accounts. Sonia thanked me for coming all that way out as she said the CEO had always insisted on coming to see me herself. I looked at Sonia with a quizzical look on my face and said "Huh, what are you talking about? Charismatic CEO has never come to my workplace to see me!" Sonia replied "Yeah yeah, she did. Charismatic CEO used to tell us that she would take you to the local nail salon so you could have a business meeting." My jaw just dropped to the floor. I then held out my hands to Sonia and showed her my chipped broken nails with ragged cuticles and white vitamin deficiency spots. My nails were bare and I said to Sonia......"do these hands and nails look like someone who frequents a nail salon?"


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